to a preschooler, it's all black and white

When a mom's out for the count, a mom's out for the count.

And kids just seem to know when to kick us when we're down.

I had a bazillion appointments yesterday. And all I wanted to do is go home and hug my daughter.

And hug her I did.

Then, out of nowhere, she says, "Mom, why do people have different skin?"

Different skin?

"Amara, what do you mean?" I questioned.

She explained that there's a girl at her school with skin that's a different color.

I sighed. I never thought I'd get hit with the race question this early in childhood.

How would I answer? My head hurt as it was. I couldn't think of a good answer that a four year old would comprehend.

Then eureka!

"Amara," I began. "We are Filipino. So you and Mommy have a different colored skin than Daddy because he's German. God made us all different so we can learn about each other."

"Ohhhhh. That's why there's girl at school with brown skin," she responded.

"Just like you, Amara."

"Nooooo! Mommy, I'm white."

I stopped dead in my tracks. Those words hit me like a dagger to the heart. Like I wasn't having a bad day as it was.

I have no problems with Amara being half German and half Filipino. But when she has to check off a box on a government form, she has to cross off Asian.

And when people meet her, even though I think Amara looks like Dad2Amara, everyone laments how she looks like me, a Filipino.

She has gorgeous thick black dark brown hair. Her skin is olive. And she loves her rice!

She is not white.

She's brown like me.

And with that I started beating myself up, thinking I was some sort of racist.

But I just want Amara to be proud of her heritage!

Then I realized that to Amara - it is solely about black and white. Skin color is such a cut and dry issue for kids.

But I know it won't always be the case.

How do you describe other ethnicities to your kids? If you have a mestiza, how do you instill pride in both their heritages?

cross posted on being Mom2Amara